Calamity Janes 135, Montreal Sexpos 143
Calamity Janes vs Montreal Sexpos | Feb 25, 2012 | Happy Wheels, Portland ME | Bout Recap by Milhouse Van Bouten
International roller derby action returned to Portland on February 25 as Maine Roller Derby’s Calamity Janes hosted Montréal Roller Derby’s Les Sexpos. The bout was the first bout of competition in 2012 for the Calamity Janes. And the first bout ever between the CJs and Sexpos. The last meeting between Portland and Montréal took place between the all-star squads back in May 2011, and Montéal’s New Skids on the Block doubled-up Maine’s Port Authorities 158-79. This time around, it was the B-teams taking center stage and Portland had the home field advantage.
The CJs took firm control in the beginning jams of the competition. Maine jammer Kissy Kicks racked up 22 points while rookie teammate jammer Nauti Roller added her first 3 career points in the first 6 jams. In the same time frame, the Janes defense held Montreal to just 4 points, scored by Ira Crass. Sexpos jammer The Honey Badger sparked her team in jam 7, scoring 9-0 over CJ jammer Princess Lay Her Out. Ira Crass followed up with an impressive escape from the defensive clutches of CJ blockers Cherry Clobber, T-Storm, and Busty Mayher, scoring a 4-1 jam over Nauti Roller. However Maine took control back when CJ jammer Kissy Kicks scored 9-0 over Wonderbrat. The following jam was remarkable as it marked the first 5 career points of Maine’s other debuting jammer, Bea Nimble. From there, a slugfest ensued as the teams traded offensive opportunities. Janes jammer Red-demption slammed down 13 points in jam 15 and established a 28 point lead for the CJs. The Sexpos’ Honey Badger countered with a huge 23 point jam in jam 17, allowing teammate jammer Ira Crass to take the lead on the scoreboard for the Sexpos with a 5-0 jam in jam 18. Both teams scrambled to take over the point lead as the time in the half ticked away. Jam 21 was a close trade-off as Kissy Kicks edged out the Honey Badger 14-8 in a no-lead situation. At the half, the CJs were in front 81-71, but the bout was far from over.
Montréal needed to come out swinging in the second half if they wanted to take home a win, and they did just that. Sexpos jammers Honey Badger, Falcon Punch, Beats Per Minute and Slavic Slayer steamrolled over the CJs, taking 10 jam leads out of the first 12 jams and combining for 68 points. The Sexpos defense also locked down on the CJs jammers, holding them to a measly 4 points in the same time frame. The Sexpos had amassed a huge lead and looked to be in total control with roughly half a period to go. The Janes desperately needed a boost, and in jam 13, they got an opportunity: a power jam. Bea Nimble kicked in gear for the Janes and broke Montréal’s hot streak, scoring a 12-0 jam and breathing life into her team and the crowd. Kissy Kicks followed suit and snagged the next lead, scoring 4-0 in jam 14, and suddenly the Janes were rolling. Two jams later, Kissy Kicks scored 15-0 over the Honey Badger, and the crowd was on fire. Ira Crass attempted to derail the surging Janes with a 4-0 jam, but following that, the Janes refused to be denied. Kissy Kicks, Bea Nimble and Red-Demption grabbed the next six jam leads and peppered away at Montréal’s lead.
With less than a minute to go, Montréal’s lead had dwindled to 12, and the CJs were carrying all the momentum. Kissy Kicks lined up against Honey Badger for what was sure to be the final jam. As the jam whistle blew, both jammers scrambled to get out front for control. With a swift move up the inside line, the Honey Badger grabbed the jam lead away from Kissy Kicks and quickly called the jam once regulation time expired, ending the CJs chances of completing the comeback and securing victory for the Sexpos in one of the most exciting bouts to date. Les Sexpos took a hard-fought victory back home to Canada, 143 – 131.
Most Valuable Players
Calamity Janes: Kissy Kicks
Les Sexpos: Beats Per Minute
Top Scorers
Calamity Janes: Kissy Kicks (79)
Les Sexpos: the Honey Badger (51)
Calamity Janes Roster
A-Block | Bea Nimble | Busty Mayhem | Cherry Clobber | Crazy Buchanan | Dollipops | Dubliner Broozes | Gunner Hands-Off | Kissy Kicks | Nauti Roller | Princess LayHerOut | Red-Demption | T-Storm | WrexZilla
Les Sexpos Roster
Axelle Rouge | Beats Per Minute | Bikini Skills | Charlotte Bruise-a-lot | Falcon Punch | Honey Badger | Ira Crass | Killer Kozak | Magnum PEI | Slavic Slayer | Sparkel N’ Maim | Surgical Strike | Tabarnouk | Wonderbrat
