Author Archives: zeldangerous

Maine Roller Derby presents its 7th Annual Thanks-for-giving Charity Bout on Saturday, November 18, 2017 at Happy Wheels Skate Center on Warren Avenue in Portland, Maine. It’s MRD’s way of giving back to the community. Fans, get ready to have   More...

Maine Roller Derby is excited to announce its annual fan favorite, the Wicked vs Good Bout, Saturday October 14th at the Portland Expo! This is a double header. Wicked vs Good will be followed by Casco Bay Gentleman’s Derby (CBGD) vs Mean Mountain B  More...

It’s Maine Roller Derby’s first home team bout of the season! And we. are. pumped. The Calamity Janes and RIP Tides, home team rivals, have been training all summer long and will be ready to face-off. Whether you’re familiar with the spo  More...

Join us for a special derby double-header to launch our spring season at the historic Portland Expo! First, Maine Roller Derby‘s Travel Team splits into NAVY and WHITE, pitting All-Stars against All-Stars in what promises to be an exciting and chall  More...

Maine Roller Derby is proud to present a spring officiating clinic for roller derby officials of all skill levels at the historic Portland Expo. We have gathered top-notch instructors who will share their expertise and experiences with you. You will learn  More...

MRD Port Authorities vs. Green Mountain Roller Derby | March 11, 2017 | Happy Wheels Skate Center, Portland, ME | Bout Recap by: Assassin On Saturday, March 11th, Maine Roller Derby’s Port Authorities squared off against Green Mountain Roller Derb  More...

Join Maine Roller Derby on Saturday, April 29th, 2017 for our third Travel Team bout at Happy Wheels Skate Center! Come see MRD’s Port Authorities take on the skaters from Rock Coast Rollers Doors at 5pm. Action at 5:30pm. TICKETS: http://www.brownpa  More...

Join Maine Roller Derby on Saturday, April 8th, 2017 for our second Travel Team bout at Happy Wheels Skate Center! Come see MRD’s Old Port Brigade take on the skaters from Aroostook Roller Derby Doors at 5pm. Action at 5:30pm. TICKETS: http://www.bro  More...

Join us for our first TRAVEL TEAM bout of the season! Come see MRD’s All-Stars take on the skaters from Green Mountain Roller Derby. Doors at 5pm. Action at 5:30pm. TICKETS: Advance Tickets: Click here! At the door at 5pm 2/11/17: -Adults: $8 -Kids  More...

Join Maine Roller Derby on Saturday, February 11, 2017 for our annual Hate the Love bout at Happy Wheels Skate Center! This is your last chance to see our two amazing home teams, The RIP Tides and The Calamity Janes battle it out until fall! After a nailb  More...

Details coming soon – this is our annual Winter Classic. Calamity Janes take on the R.I.P. Tides!  

Ever wish you had a time machine? You do! The future of MRD is revealed every year at this time with our annual Fresh Muscle Coming Out Bout! Get ready for an unforgettable night of derby debuts as our newest skaters take the track in competition for the   More...

Join MRD for our most wild and fun bout of the year! Our annual Thanks-for-Giving bout is focused on a local charity. Donations made by the fans will directly impact gameplay – give YOU control of the outcome of the game. Your $ donations can add po  More...

It’s that time of year again… MRD’s proud to announce our annual WICKED versus GOOD bout! This year we’ll see the Calamity Janes face off against the R.I.P. Tides, but what we don’t know is who’s on Team Wicked and who   More...

It’s the first Maine Roller Derby home team bout of the season and our 10th anniversary kick-off at the Portland Expo! We. are. pumped. The The RIP Tides and The Calamity Janes, home team rivals, have been training all summer long and will be ready   More...

Date: July 9th 2016 Location: Midcoast Recreation Center Doors Open: 4pm Event Starts: first whistle at 5pm Teams Playing: Rock Coast Rollers, Maine Roller Derby, Bangor Roller Derby, Central Maine Roller Derby Feature Photo by: Jim Vernier

You’ve seen us skate, now it’s your turn to take the track! Maine Roller Derby is starting up a new cycle of training new recruits this summer, to grow our derby family even more! Want to play roller derby? We will train you, teach you the ru  More...

This is a night for anyone interested in learning to volunteer or officiate for roller derby. We will explain the roles of referees and officials, with time to learn and practice positions. If you have ever attended a game and wondered what it takes to ma  More...

Help MRD Preserve Skating in Southern Maine! Roller skating is a valuable activity, and roller derby (especially Maine Roller Derby!) is awesome. Other local leagues (Resurgam Roller Derby, Casco Bay Gentlemen’s Derby) and activities (Derby Lite and  More...

Join Maine Roller Derby on Saturday, February 13, 2016 for our annual Hate the Love bout at Happy Wheels Skate Center! This is your last chance to see our two amazing home teams, The RIP Tides and The Calamity Janes battle it out until fall! Doors at 5pm.  More...

Our first ever Home Team Draft Night took place on Wednesday, December 2, 2015. Each new skater was given a gift to open, revealing a new uniform shirt for the team they have been placed on. Followed by a home team scrimmage of The RIP Tides v. The Calami  More...

Monday July 6th kicked off the beginning of our new recruits’ journey towards becoming full fledged, hard-hitting, scrimmage-ready athletes of our league. It was so much fun and probably the warmest it’s been in the Expo this season. After a   More...

Are you ready for it? New England’s Annual B-Team tournament? A complete Roller Derby Extravaganza? All the talent that you didn’t know was right in your own back yard? Well ready or not it’s here! It’s coming! Two days JAM PACKED with roller derb  More...

The Rock Coast Rollers presents the annual Maine Event! This year, seven Maine teams go head-to-head in 4 mini bouts. —————— Casco Bay Gentlemen’s Derby vs. Katahdin Roller Kings Old Port Brigade (Maine Roller De  More...

Not only does Maine Roller Derby have some talented athletes, there are also many talented artists! What a great way to welcome celebrate the First Friday of spring here in Maine and get excited for our next bout the following day! There will be wine, coo  More...

Tickets are available TODAY!  Come and join us! With 7 home bouts on the roster it looks like 2013 is shaping up to be very exciting for derby lovers.  Dates booked 2/16, 3/9, 4/13, 4/27, 5/11, 6/8, 6/22 are the dates to mark your calander.  You save b  More...

Team: Calamity Janes, Port Authorities Position: Pivot/Blocker/Captain League member since: June 2006 Head of Interleague and WFTDA: March 2008-September 2008 Achievements: Class Clown (2010) Best Average Defensive Score (Janes 2010 Stats Award) Highest A  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Bout Production Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Making the team When did you join MRD? Fall 2014 What I do off-skates? (hobbies, job, etc) Syste  More...

Hate the Love Maine Roller Derby is excited to announce the 2013 season, the league’s seventh season since its inception in 2006.  This highly anticipated first bout of the season will feature MRD’s B-Team, the Calamity Janes, skating out against  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Jammer League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Vote Tracker Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? jamming for my team When did you join MRD? 2014 What I do off-skates? (hobbies, job, etc) Horses, sk  More...

Are you ready for a big surprise? It’s TUGBOAT’s Birthday Bash and Maine Roller Derby’s Port Authorities are the guests of honor bringing the paddles for birthday spankings. Join us for a fundraising, birthday bashing, rocking good time   More...

What derby position(s) do you play? (or your favorite) Blocker. Aspiring Pivot. League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Sponsorship & Fundraising. Safety Committee. Home Teams Representative on BoD. Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest M  More...

The Lucky Lass Throwdown Top O’ The Morning to you! This is the bout where you pay homage to the Irish and wear your green. Hold on to your shamrocks folks as the Port Authorities take on the Rock Coast Rollers from Rockland. This is going to be a h  More...

Isn’t it a little late to start playing roller derby (i.e. Aren’t you too old)? No. I’m only too old if I think I’m too old. If there’s something you want to do, then ignore your self-doubt and do it. You’ll never know   More...

The Calamity Janes are blazing the Wild West trail once again to take on the Shoreline Roller Derby girls of Groton, CT.  This is going to be hard hitting, fast action, and a whole lot of fun.  MRD is family friendly so bring the kids and come watch thi  More...

MRD’s FIRST EVER DOUBLE HEADER! For the love of Derby can this night be anymore exciting?  We think not! First up taking the track are the Calamity Janes, taking on the Yankee Brutals from CT Rollergirls for what is sure to be an aggressive hard hi  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? All of them! League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Creative, Skater/Official Liaison Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? I didn’t give up after failing my first tryout. Then I was awarded   More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Treasurer Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? 36 laps in 5 minutes! When did you join MRD? 2012 What I do off-skates? (hobbies, job, etc) Snowboard,  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? (or your favorite) Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Secretary (Board of Directors) Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? They’re all pretty good moments When did you join MRD? 2  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Safety Committee Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? I was so glad to make the cut from fresh meat to full fledged MRD! When did you join MRD? Fall   More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Jammer League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Head of Community Outreach 2015, Tri-Head of Fresh Meat 2014 Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? When Hard Dash and I successfully executed a pegassi  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) I am on the Community Outreach Committee and also handle our Facebook Pages Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Remaining healthy and whole my first  More...

CupQuake: Magnitude 5.0-5.9. Moderate. Can cause damage of varying severity to poorly constructed buildings. At most, none to slight damage to all other buildings. Felt by everyone. Casualties range from none to a few. All while smiling and being sweet. F  More...

Maine Roller Derby presents – Fresh Muscle: Coming out Bout, Saturday, December 14, 2013 at Happy Wheels, 331 Warren Avenue, Portland, Maine.   Our fresh meat muscle have arrived and they are ready to entertain you with all they have learned.  Com  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Attendance Tracker Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? I did a one-footed transition. I had my mind on that feat for a long time. When did you join   More...

Maine Roller Derby 2014 Bout Pass Available NOW! Maine Roller Derby 2014 Bout Pass entitles you to one admission into each of the home bouts scheduled for 2014: February 15, 2014 – Hate the Love at Happy Wheels Skate Center March 15, 2014 – Lu  More...

ROAD TRIP!   Come see your Port Authorities as they take on the CT Rollergirls All-Stars: Stepford Sabotage! Click here to buy tickets!   From the CT Facebook Event Page: The first of only 2 chances to see our travel teams play at home this year  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blammer, Jocker 😉 League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Ticket sales Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? 2013 Calamity Janes Most Valuable Jammer and 2014 Hardest Hitter When did you join MRD  More...

On Thursday, January 8th, 2015, the members of Maine Roller Derby gathered at the Great Lost Bear restaurant to take part in the GLB’s epic event: The Wheel of Destiny! The Wheel of Destiny is an epic event that celebrates local Maine beer. Every   More...

December 15, 2014 | Bubba’s Sulky Lounge | Portland, ME Following a fantastical debut bout for MRD’s freshest skaters, league skaters, volunteers, fans, friends and family gathered at Bubba’s Sulky Lounge for our annual end-of-year party  More...

Have you been watching us and wanted to join? Now’s your chance! MRD is taking in new recruits THIS SEPTEMBER and will train them to be bout-ready by December! TRYOUTS WHEN? Sunday, September 14th, 2014 7:00pm – 9:30pm WHERE? Happy Wheels Skat  More...

MRD All-Stars The Port Authorities vs. Green Mountain Derby Dames All-Stars the Grade A Fancies | April 26, 2014 | The Portland Expo, Portland, ME | Bout Recap by: Zeldangerous Maine Roller Derby’s All-Star Team hoped to continue their climb up the Div  More...

Your bout preview: Maine Roller Derby vs Green Mountain Derby Dames Double Header   Following a string of big wins, Maine Roller Derby is gearing up to face some formidable opponents in our first double-header of the season this Saturday, April 26th.    More...

  While many of you were cozied up in your homes, preparing for your Wednesday work days, MRD’s C-Team The R.I.P. Tides drove 2 hours north of Portland to have their first full scrimmage as a team together on Tuesday, March 25 at 7:00pm. They m  More...

ROAD TRIP! Come see Maine Roller Derby’s Calamity Janes re-match New Hampshire Roller Derby’s B-Team, The Cherry Bombs! Join New Hampshire Roller Derby for our 2014 season opener! First up at 5 PM are the home teams, with the Granite Skate Tro  More...

MRD All Stars The Port Authorities vs. ROC City Roller Derby’s ROC Stars | March 15, 2014 | Happy Wheels Skate Center, Portland, ME | Bout Recap by: Sparrowhawk   Maine Roller Derby’s All-Star team The Port Authorities hosted the ROC Star  More...

MRD Calamity Janes vs. Roller Derby Quebec’s Les Duchesses | February 15, 2014 | Happy Wheels Skate Center, Portland, Maine | Bout Recap by: Sparrowhawk   Maine Roller Derby was proud to kick off our 2014 season with a showdown between our Cala  More...

MRD COMING OUT BOUT: TEAM FIRE vs. TEAM ICE | DECEMBER 16, 2013 | HAPPY WHEELS SKATE CENTER | BOUT RECAP BY SUGARBUSH   December’s Coming Out Bout featured Maine Roller Derby’s newest skaters (along with a few old favorites to fill out the roster  More...

THE CALAMITY JANES VS THE QUEEN CITY CHERRY BOMBS | May 4, 2013 | JFK MEMORIAL COLISEUM | BOUT RECAP BY JIMMY ROLLSOME   On May 4th Maine Roller Derby’s Calamity Janes rode the trail southwest to Manchester, NH for a showdown with New Hampshire Rol  More...

THE CALAMITY JANES VS THE YANKEE BRUTALS | APRIL 27, 2013 | THE PORTLAND EXPO | BOUT RECAP BY JIMMY ROLLSOME   The Portland Expo welcomed back Maine Roller for their first double header event, with live music entertainment by celtic-punk rock band Th  More...

The Port Authorities vs. CTRG Stepford Sabotage | April 27, 2013 | The Portland Expo | Bout Recap by Zeldangerous   Tonight’s matchup marked game number two of the evening for Maine Roller Derby’s first double header event, at the Portland Expo C  More...

The Calamity Janes vs the Salty Broads | April 13, 2013 | Happy Wheels Skate Center, Portland, Maine | Bout Recap by Jimmy Rollsome Maine Roller Derby returned to Happy Wheels on Saturday April 13, 2013, with Shoreline Roller Derby’s Salty Broads making  More...

The R.I.P. Tides versus Central Maine Derby | March 24, 2013 | The Bangor Auditorium, Bangor Maine | Bout Recap by Chris Seneca Sunday March 24, 2013, was a day of “firsts” and “lasts” in Bangor, Maine. The Inaugural Brawl marked C  More...

The Port Authorities vs Rock Coast Rollers | March 9, 2013 | Happy Wheels Skate Center, Portland, Maine | Bout Recap by Milhouse Van Bouten   Maine Roller Derby’s Port Authorities kicked off their competitive season with the annual March Lucky  More...

Calamity Janes vs Bangor Roller Derby | February 16, 2013 | Happy Wheels Skate Center, Portland, Maine | Bout Recap by Milhouse Van Bouten They’re baaaaaaaaaack…. Maine Roller Derby is back for a 2013 season that is sure to be unlike any othe  More...

Ever wanted to visit Florida? Well come and cheer on our Port Authorities as they travel to Florida for a 3-day tournament!  Port Authorities Play: Friday 5/2/2014 @ 12:00pm EST – Maine vs. Lowcountry Highrollers All-Stars Saturday 5/3/2014 @ 10:00  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Pivot, Blocker, Jammer League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Community Outreach Committee Co-Head – 10/2013-11/2015, Youth Outreach Committee Member (3/2014-current), Video Committee Member (1/2014-current),   More...

In May we have some tough competition rolling into town! Join us for hours of action and fun as The Port Authorities take on Rideau Valley Roller Girls and The Calamity Janes go head to head with the Upper Valley Vixens. This is Maine Roller Derby&#  More...

NEW VENUE!!! Women’s and Men’s Derby!! 50/50 cash prize!!Come see two great games for the price of one at our new venue, The Center Circle 1255 Main St Rahway NJ. There is no doubt that this will be an exciting double header. First GSR’s  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? (or your favorite) Blocker/pivot! League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Current: Interleague Liasion; former head of Bout Production Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? I was awarded Most Improv  More...

You won’t want to miss our own RIP Tides as they travel for their first official bout in 2014!!! They have been training hard and are excited to have a rematch against Pioneer Valley Roller Derby’s B-Team, The Quabbin Missile Crisis. Last year  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? PB&J League position(s) held? (past and/or present) WFTDA representative Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Coaching the 2014 RIP Tides, and pegassisting Chickadee over a pack When did you join MRD?  More...

The Rock Coast Rollers will be hosting their annual Maine Event – maine teams going head to head.  Join Maine Roller Derby, Rock Coast Rollers, Bangor Derby, and Central Maine Derby as they go head to head in a round-robin style tournament.  Come   More...

Returning for their third year, your Calamity Janes will be competing at the annual New England B-Team Tournament, hosted by Worcester Roller Derby in Auburn, Mass. Their first year they took Bronze, last year they took Silver… can the Janes get the  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? (or your favorite) Blocker but I do like to jam and shock walls when I come through. League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Head of Marketing, first cheerleader (unofficial position) Favorite Derby Accomplishmen  More...

I love roller derby, and I love how open it is to people who have the will to try. I also love all of our fans, you are what makes this sport so fun (other than you know, playing roller derby!) What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker, but I am working  More...

Want to watch a baseball game, AND support our league? This Saturday is your chance! We paired up with our neighbors The Portland Seadogs to bring you a special group discount rate for tickets to see this awesome baseball team! Adult tickets are only $5.0  More...

Have you been watching us and wanted to join? Now’s your chance! MRD is taking in new recruits THIS SEPTEMBER and will train them to be bout-ready by December!   TRYOUTS WHEN? Sunday, September 14th, 2014 7:00pm – 9:30pm WHERE? Happy Whee  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Jammer League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Sponsorship & Fundraising Committee Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Trying out and making the team! When did you join MRD? October 2014 What   More...

Come and see our RIP Tides in their first ever HOME BOUT. They’ve scrimmaged, they’ve gone to tournaments… they’ve traveled for bouts… but now you can see them on their home turf! Doors 4:00pm First bout: RIP Tides vs. Centra  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Jammer aspiring to pivot League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Marketing Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Making it through my first bout without puking or crying When did you join MRD? Septe  More...

Want to see ALL of your favorite MRD skaters on the track at once? This is your chance! Wicked Vs. Good is making another return as our annual favorite inter-league event. Join us Saturday, October 11th at the Portland Expo for our 7th annual WICKED V. GO  More...

This year we are pairing up with our friends at Hardy Girls, Healthy Women! Fans, get ready to have some fun and do your part for a fantastic community organization! Don’t like what’s going on with the team your favorite skater is on? You can   More...

What derby position(s) do you play? To be determined League position(s) held? (past and/or present) BOD Member at Large Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Surviving fresh meat felt pretty good! When did you join MRD? I tried out in Septem  More...

Maine Roller Derby presents – Fresh Meat: Coming out Bout, Saturday, December 13, 2014 at Happy Wheels, 331 Warren Avenue, Portland, Maine. Our fresh meat have arrived and they are ready to impress  you with all they have learned.  Come see them i  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? All the derby!!! League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Finance Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Being chosen to be an alt for the R.I.P. Tides bout a month after my Coming Out Bout When did y  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Fresh Muscle Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? That one time in scrimmage where I had the realization that I was in position to hit the opposing j  More...

I am a proud, strong, athletic woman! What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Safety committee Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Making a team! 🌊💀 When did you join MRD? July 2015   More...

Head of Events/After-Party/Fun Times Committee.

You’ve seen us skate, now it’s your turn to take the track! Maine Roller Derby is starting up a new cycle of training new recruits this summer, to grow our derby family even more! Want to play roller derby? We will train you, teach you the ru  More...

A Melting Icicle under the Eaves even the awe-inspiring glory of the empire cannot coerce these freedom lovers from jumping off crashing joyously to the ground. -Fei Ma “She puts the ICE in nice.” – Grim D Mise What derby position(s) do   More...

Joined MRD: Sept 2011 Team: R.I.P.Tides

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker, aspiring blammer League position(s) held? Sponsorship/development committee Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Making the travel team right after completing Fresh Muscle When did you join MRD?   More...

September 17, 2017

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Social Media Maven, Web Team, Image Nerd Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? That time I gave Bea Nimble a SLAYride. Oh, and those two times The Cal  More...

Doctor Laser was wrong. Creating a robot modeled after the famous video game princess was not a good idea. Just like in the games, they had a tendency to get kidnapped. One Robot Zelda was not enough. He needed an army of them if he was going to take over  More...

November 30, 2012

Coach of the Port Authorities.

“Joeach” or Average Joe Coach, grew up on a diet of Kix cereal, Hostess cupcakes, and 80’s hair metal. He likes hockey, video games, and intermediate math. He occasionally climbs things. Joe got involved in MRD in April 2009 after talkin  More...

February 13, 2014

Manager for the RIP Tides in 2014 Coach of the Calamity Janes 2015 – 2017 Chair of the BOD for MRD

Date Joined MRD: First official bout – 2/11/2012 (joined in fall of 2011) Favorite Officiating Positions: IWB Also the coach of the men’s roller derby team – The Not So Jolly Rogers.

2015 Travel Team Coach 2014 Coach of the Calamity Janes Joined MRD: Sept 2011 League Position: Head of Promotional Events Team: R.I.P.Tides, Port Authorities Many people don’t know that candle leaping was once a form of divination or fortune telling  More...

FEAR THE KRAKEN!

Coach of the Port Authorities.   Like Caesar Foulin’ on Facebook!

League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Current: BOD Member-at-large Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Getting back on skates after many…many…MANY years. Any other derby accomplishments you’re proud of? Joining the derby com  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? NSO, Lineup Tracking is possibly the Best next to managing the Penalty Box League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Head of Officiating Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? State Wars, I head NSOed   More...

November 30, 2012

Formally called Brutaloo, she also is an amazing artist! Check our her work here!

November 30, 2012

Start date with the league: September 2010 Favorite Song: BRAINS!! by Voltaire Favorite Color: Gray-matter Favorite Drink: Zomb…. I generally prefer beer. Likes: The supple curves of a large cranium, the skull splitting sound of a good whistle, good  More...

Mexican Mystery Man.  

 Started with MRD in March 2006 (official since August 2008) What is your Favorite Officiating Position?“Outside pack reffing was my first love, but now I really enjoy jam reffing (which is a surprise, given how much I whined and complained when I  More...

He’s dangerously cheezie. The world’s tallest free-standing ref.

Mascot of the Calamity Janes!   Like Palomino Pete on Facebook!

Pixie Quikenwitty has naturally blue hair which is braided by professionally trained woodsprites from Maine forests. She chooses not to fly during bouts, loves a hot mic, and is devilishly tricky. Most of all, Pixie loves roller derby, and she wants to te  More...

November 30, 2012

Date Joined MRD: July 18th, 2012 Favorite Officiating Positions: Penalty Box Timer, Penalty Tracker, Scoreboard Operator Brief Bio: Originally from South Florida, Rachel decided she was too normal for that state and moved to Maine with her two cats in the  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? IPR, everything NSO, currently Head Coach of the MRD Travel Team League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Head of Officiating, Co-Head of Creative, Print & Web Designer, Web Team Manager Favorite Derby Accompl  More...

January 3, 2017

November 30, 2012

Mascot for the Port Authorities   Like Shipwreck on Facebook!

Likes: Soviet underground music entertaining temper tantrums a well-placed hip check Dislikes: Most dance music movies about bored people sitting around being bored non-entertaining temper tantrums no longer quite round skate wheels

I have my own definition: re.ha.bil.i.skate v. 1. to restore a person to normal life by training, after a period of illness or imprisonment BY MOVING VERY FAST ON 8 WHEELS. league member since June 2007 official since 2009 Also a skater for the Calamity J  More...

November 30, 2012

3…2…1…0…

  Like Upchuck Berry on Facebook!

November 30, 2012

TUGBOAT (all caps, no trick spelling) can be seen on skates with Maine’s first Men’s Roller Derby League, The Not So Jolly Rogers!

February 13, 2014

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Member @ Large BOD Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? the transition from newbie to Veteran skater When did you join MRD? September 2013 What I do   More...

Also known as Rosie.

Joined MRD: January 2011 may·hem: /ˈmeɪhɛm, ˈmeɪəm/ [mey-hem, mey-uhm] noun 1. Law. The crime of willfully inflicting a bodily injury on another so as to make the victim less capable of self-defense or, under modern statutes, so as to cripple   More...

League Member since: August 2010 League Position(s) held: Head of Events November 2010-November 2011, Head of Marketing November 2011-present Team: Calamity Janes, Port Authorities Position: Blocker Injuries: provided upon request Likes: crazycherry  More...

League member since: Aug 2010 Team: Calamity Janes, Port Authorities Position(s): jammer, blocker As a young debutante, Crazy enjoyed a carefree existence filled with parties, booze, jazz, and flaunting her disdain for ladylike behavior.  Emotionally vo  More...

Aliases Whip, Little Whippa What derby position(s) do you play? (or your favorite) Blocker/sometimes Jammer Objective Jammer – To move through the pack faster than a speeding bullet. Blocker To cause blunt force trauma. Favorite Quote “If you  More...

Joined MRD: Sept 2011 League Position(s): Member of Grievances and Mediation Committee and League Advocacy Committee Team: R.I.P.Tides, Calamity Janes “Curb Appeal” is the initial impression of a property from the street that tells you very l  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Sponsorship/Development Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Coming Out Bout 2015 When did you join MRD? Fall 2015 What MRD team do you play on? Jane  More...

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What derby position(s) do you play? Whatever my coach asks me to!! League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Safety Committee Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Making it onto a TEAM!!! Being part of MRD! Trying new and scary things!  More...

Famous for her amazing on-skates impression of X-Wings, Tie Fighters, and AT-ATs.    Like Gunner Hands Off on Facebook!

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Oh boy! After an aviation mishap, Headbutty Holly decided to think it over in her pretty little head. She chose to drop the rock but keep the roll. Now everyday, she’s eager to tell the competition how it’s gonna be, and her love for roller derby will  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Volunteer Coordinator Grievance Committee When did you join MRD? 10/13 What I do off-skates? (hobbies, job, etc) Owner of Wildflours Gluten-Free Bakery My derby nam  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) WFTDA rep, Web Team, Currently Head of Social Media Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Taking the silver medal at All 8 On The Floor tournament in   More...

League Member Since: Feb 2008 Current League Positions:Captain of the All-Star Team & Finance DirectorCoach of the Calamity JanesInterleague Liaison & WFTDA Head 2008-2009 Current Team: Port Authorities Positions: Jammer, Pivot & Blocker A  More...

Joined MRD: 2011 (transferred from Windy City) League Position: Team: R.I.P.Tides

What derby position(s) do you play? Jammer League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Training Committee Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Winning MVP Jammer at the 2013 All Eight On The Floor Tournament and for Pantsing Curve in tha  More...

Owner of Turn Two Skate Shop.   Like Kissy Kicks on Facebook!

Start date with the league: October 12, 2009 Positions held on league: League Secretary and Head of New Recruits Nov 2010-present Team(s): Port Authorities, Calamity Janes Position(s): Blocker (have jammed previously) Awards & Honors: Best Rooki  More...

February 13, 2014

About Lolo Lolo was born in a small tireswing, south of mexico. She attended a school called Stalebread Academy until the age of 3. It was then that she was expelled for flinging pickles at a teacher’s head. An orphan, she was taken in by a group of  More...

Start date with the league: August 2009 Team: Calamity Janes Positions on track: Blocker, Aspiring Pivot Achievements: Most +/- Meat Grinder 2010, Most Shutouts Meat Grinder 2010 Born into a traveling family of vaudevillians, Mae began a performance caree  More...

Joined MRD: Sept 2011 League Position: Calamity Janes tri-captain Team: R.I.P.Tides, Calamity Janes   Like Margot Tenenbomb on Facebook!

On her 16th birthday, Maul E. Ringwald closed her eyes, blew out her 16 candles and wished for one thing: love. Over the years there were many who tried to win her heart, but nothing seemed to stick. It wasn’t until many years later, and many miles trav  More...

Date Joined MRD: November 2012 Favorite Officiating Positions: unsure at the moment.

Joined MRD: Sept 2011 League Position: Team: R.I.P.Tides, Port Authorities   Like Nauti Roller on Facebook!

Joined MRD: Sept 2011 League Position: Team: R.I.P.Tides, Calamity Janes   Like Nicoleon Dynamite on Facebook!

Nutritional Beast came from space to start a rock band, but upon the discovery that Earth-rocks lack tonal pizzazz abandoned that dream to draw werewolves and skate really fast in an oval-shape. She skated a season with the Bleeding Heartland Rollergirls   More...

What derby position(s) do you play? (or your favorite) Mostly jammer, but I like blocking too! League position(s) held? (past and/or present) HR Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Getting MVJ in Bangor with the Janes at my first ever bout  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) TBD Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? training weekend with London Roller girls before moving to Maine When did you join MRD? August 2014 What I d  More...

Joined MRD: August 2010 In a galaxy far far away Princess LayHerOut got shot to earth when a comet hit her.  She landed at the Portland Expo door, and observed MRD in session.  Watching the roller derby she decided if she could be hit by a comet then su  More...

2014 Coach of the Port Authorities THE BASICS Team: Port Authorities Position: Pivot / Blocker / Captain League Member since: Sept 2006 POSITIONS HELD WITH MRD Training Coordinator: May-June 2012 President of Board of Directors: Nov 2011-May 2012 Web  More...

Joined MRD: Jan 2011 Day job: ER nurse Zodiac sign: Cancer Favorite Food: sandwiches Favorite Drinks: IPA, wine and vodka Hobbies: hiking, biking, travel, building igloos Dislikes: slow drivers, olives, delayed flights, toe socks Favorite Quote: “L  More...

League Member since: Oct 2008 League Position(s) held:League Mediator Team: Port Authorities, Calamity Janes Coach of the Port Authorities Position: Blocker / Jammer Achievements: MVP of Wicked vs Good 2009, Best Booty Block 2010 Born and raised in th  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? I think I’m meant to be a blocker… League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Safety committee Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Getting lead jammer in the first jam of my first bout! W  More...

What derby position(s) do you play? Pivot League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Captain 2014 RIP Tides, 2014 Fresh Meat Leadership Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? I was so proud of my 2014 RIP Tides for all their hard work in   More...

What derby position(s) do you play? I love to block and jam! Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Playing with my team in the coming out bout, with the support of my wonderful friends and family. When did you join MRD? Fall 2014 What I do o  More...

Sugarbush ran since birth. She ran to a remote Caribbean isle where feral goats and land crabs bickered in the mangroves. She ran to the great white Yukon, where the sun rose and set for eight hours of each day, and starved wolves begged for raisins on th  More...

League Member since:  January 2010 Team: Calamity Janes, Port Authorities Position: Co-Captain 2011, Blocker, Jammer in-training Day Job: Waitress & Baker Like T-Storm on Facebook!

re.ha.bil.i.skate v. 1. to restore a person to normal life by training, after a period of illness or imprisonment BY MOVING VERY FAST ON 8 WHEELS. League Positions Held Vice Chair, current. Member of Safety Committee, Grievance & Mediation Team, Promo  More...

Joined MRD: Jan 2011 Zodiac sign: Taurus Favorite color: Orange Favorite drink: Dark and Stormy Favorite things: Beer, singing in the shower, freestyle walking, baby dinosaurs Favorite quote: “When God gives you AIDS, make lemonAIDS.” –   More...

November 30, 2012

What derby position(s) do you play? Blocker League position(s) held? (past and/or present) Official recruitment and retention Favorite Derby Accomplishment(s) / Proudest Moment? Being able to skate backwards When did you join MRD? June 2015 What I do off-  More...

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As dawn arose over the junkyard, WrexZilla rubs her eyes. Another day in the hood she says to herself. WrexZilla was ready to break free from the walls of this South Compton trash heap. Just as she was ready to climb the wall of washers, dryers, and dilap  More...